Multiple award-winning Nollywood director and Executive Director of the Neighbourhood Child Foundation, Dr. Bakia T. Thomas, advises women not to marry a man who does not understand his responsibilities.
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If you’re dating a guy who really shows you a lot of affection and you know he loves you so much but he doesn’t spend any money on your needs even when you are convince he truly loves you, my sister the person he truly loves is not you.
Don’t be angry and start a fight with someone please, I just feel you need someone to tell you the truth so you don’t go about making plans for something serious when actually it is a joke.
Men value what they invest in.
I know you don’t like that statement. Men are investors naturally. If a man loves you, he will invest in that relation.
Your needs will be a priority to him.
Forget that nonsense you hear that men love women who don’t ask them for anything. That’s an old cheap method of making a man feel you’re a wife material.
I hope when you’re finally married to him, you will still not ask him for anything?
A man who will be responsible in marriage will show signs during courtship.
If he neglects everything that has to do with your needs when the relationship is still in the morning, don’t be fooled that when evening comes he will change.
Don’t also make the mistake to think because he doesn’t spend any money on your needs, he doesn’t spend it elsewhere.
A man will naturally value where his money is going to. Ask your husband or fiance for money, depending on his capacity and don’t ask stupidly when there is no reason to.
It’s very important.
Don’t go into any marriage with any man who doesn’t understand his responsibilities.
I know I might be wasting my time because some of you ladies, just because you want to becomes his wife, you will be giving him money and some even give a man money to marry them.
Hope you don’t get tired of giving him money in the marriage because any system you don’t sustain will automatically collapse.
Whether he is your husband or your fiance, don’t be shy to ask him for money when you have a need. Men love it because it makes them feel in charge.
That said, if you’re in a relationship with a man you’re trusting God to settle down with or you’re already married to him, sometimes you could give him a hand when you know he is down but don’t make it a habit.
You can make him lazy.
God Never Forgets!
-Dr. Bakia T Thomas
Neighbourhood Child Foundation